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Sunday, September 22, 2019

Seeing Everyone - Redux

This week we read "The Grey Havens" and finally come to the end of our text. Middle Earth is saved, and the Shire is restored. But there's one thing left to deal with...

Frodo no longer really fits into the Shire. Unlike Bilbo, he did not return from his adventure with riches, nor does he enjoy the celebrity he has gained.  He gets ill every October 6th and March 25th,  dates corresponding to his getting stabbed by the 
Nazgûl and the Ring getting destroyed respectively.  Coincidentally, Sam's firstborn is born on March 25th.  Frodo is stuck in the past, even as the future rolls on.

The One Ring is destroyed.  The lesser rings of power that still exist, the ones possessed by the Elves and Gandalf, are diminished, essentially dormant relics of a bygone age.  Indeed, the Third Age of Middle Earth is ending, and the time of the rings is over.  Gandalf and the remaining Elves will leave Middle Earth, along with two other Ringbearers - Bilbo and Frodo.  They will go to the titular "Grey Havens."

But life goes on for those remaining. Sam marries
Rosie Cotton and has more children while Merry and Pippin enjoy their celebrity status, throwing parties and wearing their war-gear for fun.  We are told:

Altogether 1420 in the Shire was a marvelous year. Not only was there wonderful
sunshine and delicious rain, in due times and perfect measure, but there seemed something more:
an air of richness and growth, and a gleam of a beauty beyond that of mortal summers
that flicker and pass upon this Middle-earth. All the children born or begotten in that year,
and there were many, were fair to see and strong, and most of them had a rich golden hair that
had before been rare among hobbits. The fruit was so plentiful that young hobbits very
nearly bathed in strawberries and cream; and later they sat on the lawns under the plum-trees
and ate, until they had made piles of stones like small pyramids or the heaped
skulls of a conqueror, and then they moved on. And no one was ill,
and everyone was pleased, except those who had to mow the grass.

How hard is it to mow the grass?  Not very.  But if life is idyllic, any work probably feels worse than it is.  But if it isn't done, would life still be idyllic?  And given the rural nature of the Shire, cut grass is of particular importance!

When we consider utopias we tend to assume they are somehow self-sufficient.  Everyone is happy and comfortable and no one really has "jobs".  But of course that's a bridge too far for the real world.  Jobs will always need to be done.  A good world requires maintenance.  How important is it, then, to appreciate those who allow the rest of us live so well?

I find a parallel between this passage and what we discussed in the first chapter, and it is fitting to end revisiting the important concept of seeing everyone.  The modern world works because of so much behind-the-scenes maintenance.  We see this best when that maintenance breaks down.  Unfixed potholes, food and product recalls, NAZIs and other hatemongers being given space in the metaphorical public square, blackouts, cell coverage dead zones, empty Wikipedia pages.  So much of our world works well - until it doesn't - and the underlying fragility becomes all too obvious.

It is important to notice and show kindness to those who upkeep our society.  Learn the names of the facility workers of the places you frequent, or wave to the trash collectors and street cleaners, or call out people and businesses on Twitter for doing the right thing, not just the wrong thing.

It is also important to remember our own role in that upkeep.  While some people's actual jobs directly support our society, that doesn't excuse the rest of us from having a part.  And if, as our text suggests, the work required to maintain a modern society is at least mildly unpleasant, then the work should be shared as much as possible.  Our society is not built on the backs of an unlucky underclass, but is created by the people, for the people.  This work is all of ours, and that's the real lesson of seeing everyone.  Beyond seeing them for who they are, try to see yourself in them.

This was a Patreon project, but it's done now, so there's no need to contribute anything.  Thanks for reading!

Sunday, September 8, 2019

Elevating Others

"Always make the other person feel important."
-Dale Carnegie

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This week we read "The Scouring of the Shire."  The Hobbits return finally to their Shire... only to find the gate locked and guarded.  To their shock, the whole Shire has become occupied by 'ruffians', men who steal the wealth of the land, enforce unfair rules on the hobbits, and beat up any who resist.  It's unclear how long this has been happening, but one thing is clear: It's been long enough.

While Frodo hopes for a peaceful resolution, battle seems inevitable.  The hobbits rouse the countryside and there is a battle in which some Hobbits are killed.  While the Shirefolk are elated at their victory, Frodo takes on the task of preventing needless destruction.  He protects those men who surrender during the fighting.

Let's back up a bit:

When the hobbits first return to the Shire, they find their people to be downtrodden and frustrated.  We are told they are welcomed into Farmer Cotton's house, where:

They sat with the family in the warm kitchen, and the Cottons
asked a few polite questions about their travels, but hardly listened to the
answers: they were far more concerned with events in the Shire.

Escapism requires some sort of comfort.  People want escapism when their life is too boring or too stressful.  But people whose livelihoods are directly in danger rarely want an escape - they want a solution.  If you're able to be, even briefly, comfortable, you can enjoy an escape from your life.  But if your personal or family's safety is in immediate danger, you're unlikely to enjoy a distraction.

While the Cotton's are doing what is polite (asking visitors about themselves), the hobbits are not.  The hobbits already know what happened in Moria and Mordor and Rohan and Gondor.  They don't gain much by telling what happened - especially if their audience is barely listening.  And it is always clear when your audience is ignoring you.

The Cotton's, like most people, are most interested in themselves.  If you want to persuade others to listen to you, you must find a way to get them invested.  To circle back to the quote we opened with:  "Always make the other person feel important."  

Now, how does persuasion fit into an ethical life?  We live in a democracy, and at least we live in communities.  Things rarely change because one person decides it.  They must get a group of people to support them.  Having a good idea, by which I mean capital "G" good, is not enough.  You must get others to buy-in.

Maybe it's easier for bad actors to make their case because the benefit is more obvious.  Robbing a bank, or a country, enriches.  Cheating means winning with less effort.  But doing good is less clearly beneficial for individuals.  We must learn how to make the case.

Giving them "the wrong side of history" shpiel, or telling privileged people to "make room" for others is not a winning argument.  What people think of us in the future is not terribly motivating, and willingly sacrificing what little influence individuals feel they have is an incredibly hard sell (It also makes power appear to be a zero-sum game, which increases social friction, and plays into some of the very worst ideas)  To persuade people, you must show them how they benefit.

Let's take diversity, which is one of those things most of my friends take for granted as good, but have a hard time explaining why it is.  When challenged, then, they are unable to respond other than to repeatedly insist - which isn't persuasion at all.  So when they encounter arguments like "People should stick with their own kind because the races have different strengths and weaknesses, and mixing causes those strengths to dilute and the weaknesses to multiply," they don't know what to say besides the very simple truth of "That's a monstrous opinion and also genetically wrong."  But calling something monstrous and scientifically unsound isn't a compelling or informative argument.  Even if it were, it only denies diversity is bad.  One still ought to show why diversity is good.

Here's what I've learned to say:  "Diversity of people means a diversity of experience.  The more varied experience a group has the better equipped they are to overcome different challenges."  It's no longer a moral issue, but a practical one.  You show the benefit in a tangible way.  This may not convince everyone.  Some will require more reasons, and some have their pride tied up in their opinion, and we need not worry about them.  Social isolation as we convince those around them will do the trick.  By elevating others and showing them the value of diversity, we simultaneously reduce the standing of racists.

It can be strange to argue such a moral issue as diversity in practical terms, but if our goal is to promote diversity, I don't think we should be committed to an ineffective tactic.

Later on, Frodo runs into this problem, too. The hobbits, now roused, are out for blood. But Frodo, tamed by his close relationship with evil, implores them to avoid any killing. The hobbits begrudgingly agree. When the battle comes Frodo's "chief part had been to prevent the hobbits in their wrath at their losses, from slaying those of their enemies who threw down their weapons. ".

Interpreted generously, Frodo is enforcing basic ethics where they are needed most: In battle. Wrath is immoral.  Those who surrender should be spared.  Otherwise, all battle becomes a bloodbath till the end, for why would anyone surrender if they'll be killed anyway?  Frodo is doing his part to create a foundation for peace after the battle is over.

But Frodo's tactics are certainly ineffective. His journey has granted him serious wisdom, but what good is it if he enforces it without teaching it.  Granted, the Shirefolk are in dire need and their certainly isn't a lot of time for education.  But Frodo does not understand the anger of his fellows, and he does not try to.  If you won't try to understand someone's point of view, if you won't validate the valid concerns they have, what hope will you have of persuasion?  Why should they listen when you don't?

Creating a groundswell of support is difficult.  It takes time and effort.  You need grit to endure the barriers you will encounter.  It is easy, at a certain point, to see the people you're convincing as targets.  After all, you're giving the same basic pitch to everyone.  But to create sustainable change, you must keep in mind the individual.  People are more likely to cling to ideas, and the people who promote those ideas, that make them feel important and seen.

The Lord of the Rings: An Ethical Guide is a Patreon-supported project.  Thank you to all those who have contributed.

Like this project?  Want to learn more?  Want exclusive access to behind-the-scenes content?  Go to my Patreon site and see how you can become a part of the action!

Tuesday, September 3, 2019

Information, Outrage, and Drama

This week we read "Many Partings" and "Homeward Bound".  In these chapters the hobbits begin their journey back to the Shire, stopping at Edoras to bury Theoden, Isengard to see Treebeard, and finally Bree to see Barliman.  While at Isengard, Gandalf asks Treebeard about Saruman, who has been held captive in his tower, Orthanc.  Treebeard says he's been updating Saruman on world events, and that Saruman was never happy with the news.

‘Then why did he stay to listen? Did you go into Orthanc?’ asked Gandalf.
‘Hoom, no, not into Orthanc!’ said Treebeard. ‘But he came to his
window and listened, because he could not get news in any other way, and though
he hated the news, he was greedy to have it; and I saw that he heard it all. But I added
a great many things to the news that it was good for him to think of.
He grew very weary. He always was hasty. That was his ruin.’

I was thinking earlier this week about "drama".  A lot of people pride themselves on "not getting involved in drama," but what does that really mean?  Who's dating whom, tensions between friends, who's feeling stressed out, etc.  In that case, drama is just information.  What's so bad about that?

Saruman is defeated and trapped.  There's nothing really for him to do but gather information, so he does.  That's understandable.  The problem, actually, stems from Treebeard.  He says he 'added' things 'it was good for [Saruman] to think of'.  Treebeard here is not just giving him information, but using the opportunity to teach him a lesson.

Maybe that's where information becomes "drama."  Sharing information about your friends to teach people a lesson, or some other agenda.  Sharing information on its own is fine, but when you 'add' your own editorializing, that crosses a line.  It's important to know what's happening in your friend group, but you perhaps don't need to know why.

I host a regular game night that has sought to bridge my different friend groups together.  As a result, my friends now have connections that exist primarily through me.  By coincidence two attendees of this game night, from two entirely different friend groups, have now gone through divorces.  When people started asking why they no longer came, I was transparent - they're busy dealing with their divorce.  When pressed for more details, I was less open.  I knew the details, but it didn't serve a purpose to share them, and would just be gossip and "drama".

Of course, Saruman holds some of the responsibility.  Saruman doesn't notice Treebeard is leading him astray.  His greed for any information blinds him to such reflection.  Treebeard exploits Saruman's hunger, and so causes his ruin.  And while we shouldn't blame the victim, how can we expect the assailant to do better?  Moreover, what kind of ethical life can we pursue if we also say ethics is only possible for the powerful?  There are so many instances in our life when we don't have power - but powerlessness does not exempt us from our ethical duties.

I think social media companies are the "Treebeards"of our time.  They give us what they think we should have - what they think best benefits them.  If we spend more time on their platforms arguing than agreeing, then it is in their interest to outrage us as often as possible.  But endless outrage is not healthy, for us nor society.

It would be nice if Facebook and other social media sites stopped working to get us addicted to their platforms.  But that seems unlikely.  It is therefore incumbent on us to learn to resist their tricks, or at least be aware when we fall for them, so we might resist them in the future.

That's drama.  Knowing there are concentration camps in America is important information to know.  Knowing your friend's uncle supports them and loudly says so online is drama.  He doesn't have any power to close them.  Arguing with him, even if you succeed, has no impact.  It would be better to let him be and focus your energies on other methods to close the camps.

Your outrage must be aimed against people in power in ways they will feel it.  Otherwise, you will "grow very weary", and it will "be your ruin."  Don't be hasty with your outrage.  Wanting information only to satiate your hunger or spreading it to teach a lesson or blow off steam, is drama.  Take a breath and use your outrage, political or personal, with intention.  If we don't, we will be at the mercy of the Treebeards, which paternalistically give us only what they think we should get, while we stand at the window and listen, greedily updating our news feeds for the latest outrage, but too burnt out to address anything.

The Lord of the Rings: An Ethical Guide is a Patreon-supported project.  Thank you to all those who have contributed.

Like this project?  Want to learn more?  Want exclusive access to behind-the-scenes content?  Go to my Patreon site and see how you can become a part of the action!

Saturday, August 24, 2019

Balancing Surprise and Transparency

Gandalf said: ‘Many folk like to know beforehand what is to be set on the table; but those who have laboured to prepare the feast like to keep their secret; for wonder makes the words of praise louder.’

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This week we read "The Steward and the King."  Our heroes return to Minas Tirith, victorious against Sauron.  Aragorn is crowned king and Faramir surrenders stewardship.  It has a future.

Look again at the quote this post opened with.  After his coronation Aragorn asks the Fellowship to remain in Minas Tirith a little longer.  No one is sure why, and Aragorn will not explain.  Gandalf, when prodded by the hobbits, gives the above answer - which isn't much of an answer at all.

Surprises sure are fun to plan.  It's fun imagining the other person's reaction.  What will they say when they unwrap your gift?  Oh, how they'll cheer when everyone jumps from behind the furniture and shouts surprise.  There's joy in the anticipation of the receipt.  What could have been a regular event becomes elevated when revealed all at once.  Surprises are thrilling.

But not all thrills are good.  Some people find surprises anxiety-inducing.  Being driven to a secret location for a date or coming home to find dozens of friends and family inside ready to party may put some people off in a major way.  What was intended as a good experience becomes a bad one instead.

And then there's just curiosity.  When one is keeping a secret, weird behavior is inevitable.  The person will want to know why you're being weird.  "Why can't we go back to my place until 6:15?"  Anticipation can turn to suspicion.  And how can we expect someone who's suspicious to then enjoy a surprise?

Like most things in life, the answer lies in knowing your audience.  If you want to surprise someone you know has anxiety, ask them their comfort level far in advance.  If you ask them a few days before you plan to surprise them, they may feel pressured into saying yes.  You also won't have much time to adjust your plan.  You also will have given away the surprise!!  So ask them well in advance.  "Hey, it's your birthday in a few months.  I'd like to surprise you.  What kind of surprises would you be OK with?"  A few months notice lets them know you will take what they say into account, but it also gives them time to forget you had the conversation so that they can still actually be surprised.

But there are those who, once you open that Pandora's box, will never be able to stop thinking about it.  Is *this* the day of the surprise?  They'll think about it every day, and when it finally happens they aren't excited, but instead relieved it's finally here.

For those you should be more explicit.  "We're throwing you party on Saturday, but I won't tell you the theme," or "Hey tomorrow we're going on a date but I'm not telling you where except that it's near the ocean."  This gives recipient some parameters of expectation while still leaving some room for surprise.  Done correctly, this can even be used to increase good anticipation.

A key aspect of an ethical life is treating people as individuals.  While we may want to "prepare the feast" in secret, surely the goal of any surprise is the joy of the recipient.  What good is your surprise if it kicks their anxiety into overdrive and makes them suspicious or nervous?  The surprise should be about the other person's enjoyment, not the thrill you get from keeping them in the dark.

At the end of the chapter we learn what Aragorn has been waiting for - Arwen, Elrond's daughter -was coming so the two could be married.  And Aragorn, I suspect along with many celebrities and politicians, wanted his friends present at the wedding among the crowds and 'official' guest list.  There is probably something worth saying that the Elves are both leaving Middle Earth and becoming part of Gondor's bloodline, but that discussion is for another time.

The Lord of the Rings: An Ethical Guide is a Patreon-supported project.  Thank you to all those who have contributed.

Like this project?  Want to learn more?  Want exclusive access to behind-the-scenes content?  Go to my Patreon site and see how you can become a part of the action!

Sunday, August 18, 2019

Nothing Will Remain the Same

This week we read "The Field of Cormallen".  The parallel narratives of our text are brought back together as we see what happens to Aragorn, et al, the moment the Ring plunges into Mount Doom.  The Nazgûl fade away, their existence being tied to the Ring.  The orcs flee, for the fear of Sauron no longer drives them to fight.  Many of the men who fought for Sauron see "the ruin of their war and the great majesty and glory of the Captains of the West," and throw their weapons down in surrender.  But some of the men continue to fight: Those who were "deepest and longest in evil servitude" and also "proud and bold."

Though we usually believe orcs are an evil race (largely because of the Elves), consider that as soon as Sauron fell, they ceased to serve him.  Though we can see their flight as cowardice, isn't it really pragmatic?  They were Sauron.  If Sauron is defeated, why continue to fight?

It is the humans who obey him beyond his own existence.  Their pride had become so tied up with his cause they couldn't see any way forward without him.  They preferred to die fighting for a lost cause than find a new cause to which to pledge themselves.  For this lack of vision, they are destroyed.

Later in the chapter we find Sam and Frodo safely in Ithilien.  Gandalf has summoned the Eagles to take him to Mount Doom to rescue them from the eruption.  Sam wakes up in a bed and wonders if he's just been having a dream.  But then he sees Gandalf standing at the foot of his bed, and:

Sam stared with open mouth, and for a moment, between
bewilderment and great joy, he could not answer. At last he gasped: ‘Gandalf!
I thought you were dead! But then I thought I was dead myself.
Is everything sad going to come untrue? What’s happened to the world?’

Sam is in awe at his situation.  Not only has he and Frodo survived their Quest, but Gandalf has survived, too.  Things are better than he expected.  But imperfections persist.  Frodo still has lost a finger.  Theoden and Boromir are still dead.  Though there is victory, there is also cost.

I have a new job.  It pays very well, and it has excellent benefits, and it is with a good organization, and it has good hours, and the people are very good.  I've been able to enjoy this summer in a way I've rarely been able to enjoy a summer since I was a child.  It's been a real treat.

But this job has me working with adults.  And I miss working with kids.  And as the school year begins I expect to miss it more acutely.  Though I am thriving in a way that is beyond my greatest hopes, personally and professionally, it is not without cost.  Hell, my job doesn't use ANY of the education I have.  It's a little wild when I consider I could have gotten this job a few years ago before all that grad school.  Like I wasted all that time and money.

Progress is not 'everything sad coming untrue'.  What's done is done, and it cannot be undone.  Progress is learning what we can from 'everything sad' that happened to us, and applying it to the future.  An unrequited relationship, a bad friend, a bad job, whatever.  Whether or not I could have gotten this job before isn't helpful to think about.  I ought to consider what I learned from those late nights and early mornings and lack of paid time off.  I may not have been as appreciative of this job as I am if I didn't know the hell of my other options.  Working in education remains a dream of mine, but the fact is twice I've lost jobs because the school needed to cut costs and I was the most recent hire.  There isn't much I can do about that, except hope that next time I work at a school it happens to somebody else.  And that's terrible.

The past is a key aspect of progress.  Without one, there's no way to measure the other.  But the past is also worth letting go of, at least collectively.  The future is coming.  Nostalgia is inherently unethical because it suggests the past, which is unattainable, was better.  Any school of thought that necessitates the future must be worse and looks to the past for comfort should be banished from our mind.  It will badly impede progress and make us sound like fools.  But most damningly, it provides solace without providing solutions.

Recall what happened when Sauron was defeated.  There were four reactions.
1.  The Nazgûl, whose very existence had become tied to the Ring, ceased to exist.
2.  The orcs, who fought out of fear of punishment, fled.  Finally given a choice, they turned away from battle.
3.  Many of the humans, who suddenly saw the error of their ways, surrendered.
4.  "Those that were deepest and longest in evil servitude" fought to the death.

And from these we can see four ways to respond to change

1.  Obsolescence.  The Nazgul are gone.
2.  Retreat.  The Orcs will be back, eventually.
3.  Acquiescence.  Those who surrendered accepted their loss and are willing to change with the times.
4.  Stubbornness.  Those who fought back even when all was lost.  We are not told, but surely some soldiers on Gondor fell defeating them.

We can deal with 1-3.  When things are obsolete it is because they are replaced.  They are rarely missed.  Retreating from progress can be problematic, but we must accept that not everyone will accept progress.  As long as they retreat from the mainstream, their enduring presence is little more than a radar blip.  Consider the Amish, or Texan Separatists.  However, they can become a problem if, in their retreat, they gain strength and return to the mainstream (consider modern NAZIs and Confederate Apologists).  But most of the time those who retreat remain in retreat.  Acquiescence is of course the best response.  Minds and labor are resources and the more people who are involved in society the more of those resources we have.

#4 is the most dangerous one, a stubborn and active refusal not only to progress, but to allow others to, also.  Those who had become so involved in Sauron's plan that taking it away was like taking away their identity.  They stood for a last battle so inevitably hopeless it isn't even in the narrative.  And yet it's inconceivable they inflicted no losses to Gondor.  Those are lives lost needlessly.  That soldier could have come home and become a baker or a mason or a teacher - not to mention also a parent and member of their community.  Instead, they are dead - killed defeating the defeated. 

The changes that occur to our world in the name of progress - and in spite of it - are permanent.  Both the revolutionary ones and the counter-revolutionary ones.  Victory does not undo the bad things, it just allows us to address them. 

Sooner or later, the Trump administration, the very embodiment of stubborn resistance to progress, will end. The right-wing governments sweeping the globe will not last forever.  They will replaced by something else: Whether better or worse is yet to be seen.  But the scars they leave behind will remain with us.  We must be prepared to look forward.  We must strive to make the world a better place, even if we lose a finger in the effort.


The Lord of the Rings: An Ethical Guide is a Patreon-supported project.  Thank you to all those who have contributed.

Like this project?  Want to learn more?  Want exclusive access to behind-the-scenes content?  Go to my Patreon site and see how you can become a part of the action!

Sunday, August 11, 2019

Growing From Evil

This week we read "Mount Doom."  We are at the culmination of The Quest.  Finally, Frodo and Sam arrive at Mount Doom.  But they find that Gollum, too, has come.  A series of struggles begin, and we are surprised to find Gollum comes out on top.  But in his victory he missteps and falls into the Cracks of Doom.  The Ring is destroyed.  The Quest has succeeded.

Frodo and Sam escape Mount Doom, but the volcano is erupting and a sudden 'black rain' has begun to fall.  It seems unlikely they will escape alive.  Frodo turns to Sam and says:

But do you remember Gandalf’s words: Even Gollum may
have something yet to do? But for him, Sam, I could not have destroyed
the Ring. The Quest would have been in vain, even at the
bitter end. So let us forgive him!

Gollum had two very pivotal moments this chapter.  After attacking Frodo the first time and losing, Sam attacks him with Sting.  We are told,

'Now!’ said Sam. ‘At last I can deal with you!’ He leaped forward with drawn blade
ready for battle. But Gollum did not spring. He fell flat upon the ground and whimpered.
‘Don’t kill us,’ he wept. ‘Don’t hurt us with nassty cruel steel! Let us live, yes,
live just a little longer. Lost lost! We’re lost. And when Precious goes we’ll die,
yes, die into the dust.’ He clawed up the ashes of the path with his
long fleshless fingers. ‘Dusst!’ he hissed.

Sam is moved to pity and he does not strike.  Gollum slinks away, defeated.  We are told one of the reasons Sam spares him is that Sam recalls his brief time bearing the Ring.  He has some idea of it's burden.  Meanwhile, Gollum bore the Ring for hundreds of years.  Sam can empathize with Gollum in a new way, and this empathy is what moves him to pity.  Soon after though, Frodo betrays the Quest:

‘I have come,’ he said. ‘But I do not choose now to do what Icame to do. I will not do this deed. The Ring is mine!’

And suddenly, as he set it on his finger, he vanished from
Sam’s sight. Sam gasped, but he had no chance to cry out,
for at that moment many things happened.


One of those many things was the return of Gollum.  He returns and fights Frodo one more time.  This time he is victorious, retrieving the Ring in the most violent way imaginable - by biting through Frodo's bone and taking the whole finger with him.  But during victory dance he falls into Mount Doom.  Oops.

Gollum did nothing but evil this whole chapter - but his actions were crucial to the Quest's success.  We know Sam never would have attacked Frodo, and he certainly never would have won such a struggle.  Further, Sam and Frodo only got as far as they did with Gollum's assistance.  Recall he shows them the secret way into Mordor - their plan was to, ahem, "simply walk into Mordor."  Through the front gate, no less!  Gollum also guided them through the Dead Marshes.  Though evil, Gollum was useful, particularly in navigating evil spots.

We'd discussed before how Gollum is like a past trauma - something that follows and drives us forward.  I think Gollum can represent the lessons learned.  If you're in a harrowing situation once, you're more likely to successfully navigate it the next time.  At least, the darkness isn't so blinding, even if it remains dark.  Such knowledge can also give new empathy, such as with Sam's decision to spare Gollum.

Frodo implores Sam to forgive Gollum.  Forgiveness is not in vogue nowadays, and perhaps it shouldn't be on a political scale.  But in our personal realm, it ought to be on our mind.  Evil, and it's more common cousin 'bad', is self-destructive.  In most cases, when someone causes harm, they are hurting and will hurt themselves again.  Badness brings harm into the world, and not always where it's intended.  This is the lesson of Gollum destroying the Ring.  If you carry ill-will within you, it may lead you to destroy the things you care about the most.  Bad is inherently destructive.

Likewise, it is difficult for good to lead to harm.  By it's nature, good helps.  But sometimes good isn't enough.  The Ring was not going to go down easy.  Frodo's desire to do good wasn't enough.  Gollum's darkness, and his familiarity with evil, was needed for success.

We all carry baggage that is akin to Gollum.  Something we loathe, but our familiarity with it also gives us understanding.  It can help us navigate new difficulties, and hopefully we can see how to use it to our advantage instead of always being victimized by it.  We must be willing to reach into the abyss to preserve what we love.

Nevertheless, though the Ring and Gollum are evil, Frodo and Sam remain good despite their close encounters with them.  But it wouldn't be right to say Frodo and Sam are unchanged by the experience.  The Ring does change Frodo - he loses a finger.  He also, as we will see, doesn't quite fit in the world any more.  But Sam also changes.

Sam has wanted to kill Gollum since the moment he met him.  When he finally gets the opportunity he knew too much about Gollum's tragedy to strike.  Beyond knowing he understood and felt Gollum's burden.  Sam shows significant growth here.  His encounter with evil drives him to mercy.

So that's the real lesson here.  It isn't to remain unchanged by evil.  It is to subvert evil, to learn about it and use that knowledge to its own undoing.  Gollum is spared and yet he throws his life away.  If you encounter evil and resist it unchanged that is a worthy feat.  But it would be even better to wrestle with it, grow from it, and find how it can be turned to good.


The Lord of the Rings: An Ethical Guide is a Patreon-supported project.  Thank you to all those who have contributed.



Like this project?  Want to learn more?  Want exclusive access to behind-the-scenes content?  Go to my Patreon site and see how you can become a part of the action!

Sunday, August 4, 2019

Ethics in Choicelessness

This week we read "The Land of Shadow," which is truly one of my least favorite chapters of the text.  It's a bit dull and not much of importance happens.  I wouldn't quite go so far as to call it filler, and there is one very important moment that connects the dual timelines (We learn exactly where Frodo and Sam are when the Witch-King is destroyed), but the plot hardly moves at all.

Sam and Frodo are on the last part of their march to Mount Doom.  They have some close encounters with quite a few orcs, who give themselves away easily because they are always so loud.  One moment stands out:

‘There now!’ he laughed, flicking at their legs. ‘Where there’s a whip there’s a will, my slugs.
Hold up! I’d give you a nice freshener now, only you’ll get as much lash as your skins will
carry when you come in late to your camp. Do you good. Don’t you know we’re at war?’

The orc commander is pushing his soldiers on and on - he is cruel with his whip and his words.  He tells them any pause will be punished later and guilts them with the reminder of war.  They say "Where there's a will there's a way," but what if that will comes from the lash of a whip?

People are motivated by two things:  Long-term goals and immediate urgency.  The long-term goals is what makes us human.  Animals don't have college or careers or mortgages or representative government or artistic ambition or weight-loss goals.  All of those things take a particular level of planning.

Immediate urgency is much more innate and natural:  Staying home from work when you're sick (or going to work anyway because you can't afford to take days off); caring for a hurt loved one; handing your money over to a mugger.  These are all things that interrupt our regular routine and usually our long-term goals.  But, as humans, some of our responses to immediate urgency look like this: eating a cheeseburger because it's tastier than a salad (not to mention cheaper and faster); playing video games when you have errands to run; putting off exercise yet another day; doing what is familiar and comfortable instead of what is new and challenging.  All of these things feel good in the moment, but many have unwanted consequences down the line.

That doesn't mean responding to immediate urgency is bad.  You should pretty much always just hand your money over when you're being robbed.  But obviously having your money taken in this way is a blow to your long-term goals.  But so is resisting the mugger and potentially being physically hurt.  So is working 60 hours a week until you collapse from burn-out.  So is eating so much salad that you see food only as a source of energy and not of pleasure.  There is a tension between keeping to our long-term goals and responding to immediate urgency.  Life without comfort sucks.  You need to find a balance.

The Internet is full of "success strategies."  They tend to be bullshit.  The author takes what works for them and assumes it will work for everyone.  That's not how people function - different people need different strategies.  If finding the right strategy was easy we wouldn't need to learn it - we'd already know.

I'm not going to give any success strategies, because success is beyond the realm of ethics.  Instead I want to talk about the underlying motivations I previously pointed out.

What drives you?  Are you hoping to move towards a better life than you have now, or are you hoping to escape a currently bad situation?  They are two sides of the same coin, but which one speaks to you more important.

If you're aiming for a better life, it is likely easier for you to focus on your long-term goals.  Your motivation is pulling you forward in a specific direction.  Studying late nights for exams or getting up early for work every day or sticking to a schedule is easier because you know what's on the other side of that struggle.

If you're trying to escape a bad situation it's much harder to focus on long-term goals.  Your motivation isn't pulling you in one direction, but simply pushing you away from what's bad.  But there are lots of ways to escape bad situations.  One can take more naps (sleep is an escape for many), one can consume media, one can eat comfort foods, etc.  Few of these short-term solutions lead to long-term success, but we can't hold such short-term thinking against people who are suffering.  "Where there's a whip there's a way."  The orcs in front may not be receiving the whip, but I am sure the threat of the whip is what's making them stay up front.

So aiming for a better life is clearly superior - in terms of likelihood of success.  However, that's a matter of circumstance, not choice.  For ethical considerations to be relevant, choice must be present.  So the ethics is not in our own motivation, but how we view that of others.

People who are trying to escape a bad situation face an enormous amount of pressure.  If you are aiming for a better life you can take a day or two off sometimes to relax and recharge.  If you're trying to escape a hard life you do not have that privilege.  Every day is a struggle.

For those of us who are fortunate enough to live in relative comfort - who seek only to better their at least decent lives - we should be grateful to have such a solid foundation beneath us.  We should extend that gratitude to others who don't have it, and be kind and helpful to them when we encounter them, so they can conserve their energy for the conflicts in their lives that are currently unavoidable.  If we can help them deal with those conflicts, all the better!  But, at least, we should do no harm.

So when you see someone who you believe is struggling make choices that address immediate urgency but don't support their long-term goals, go easy on them.  Few people are motivated by guilt.  Shit can be tough, and while they also want a better life (obviously) sometimes it's more important for them to get some relief and comfort now, consequences be damned.  We aren't machines and we cannot endure difficulty without respite.

And for those who are trying to escape a bad situation remember you don't have to own your burdens all on your own.  There are almost certainly people around you to whom you can unload your troubles - if only verbally.  Your troubles, whatever they are, are hard enough.  Don't empower them by isolating yourself.  We are social beings.  Not everything is the whip that is driving you onward.  If you internalize your struggles, you risk carrying them around with you even after you have escaped them.  The best defense is to occasionally share your story with others.  Anyone who calls themselves your friend will listen.

The Lord of the Rings: An Ethical Guide is a Patreon-supported project.  Thank you to all those who have contributed.

Like this project?  Want to learn more?  Want exclusive access to behind-the-scenes content?  Go to my Patreon site and see how you can become a part of the action!

Saturday, July 27, 2019

Stranger Rings

Spoiler alert for all 3 seasons of Stranger Things.


This week we read "The Tower of Cirith Ungol."  Separated from his master, Sam searches the Orc hideout in the hopes of finding Frodo before it's too late.  It's an interesting chapter, not least because Sam is the main character throughout.  However, this week I want to do something different.


While we’ve been reading Lord of the Rings to try to shine light on our own lives, one could also use it to shine light on other works.  One’s enjoyment of Star Wars is enhanced if you’re familiar with samurai films.  The Lion King proves a good introduction to the seeminglydense Hamlet.  Art informs art.

When I finished the third season of Stranger Things, I was struck by the parallels to Lord of the Rings.  For those who have chosen not to watch Stranger Things, here's a very brief synopsis:
  • In the first season: Will Byers is a young boy who is attacked by an evil monster that was unleashed by government inter-dimensional testing.  The monster uses Will as a conduit to our own world.  Eleven is a talented young girl who is taken from her family and trained by the government to hone her Jedi-like powers.  Flashbacks show her fighting the monster that attacked Will.  Through the season they become friends and at the end of the season Eleven faces the monster, which has completed the interdenominational jump, and sends it back.
  • The second season is less remarkable.  Though free from the monster, Will retains a connection with it, and can sense when it is active in its own world.  Eleven tries to find and reconnect with her family.
  • In the latest season, the monster returns.  This time it takes over Billy, the school bully.  Will and Eleven fight him.  Eleven, in a mental/Jedi struggle with Billy, learns he developed into a bully because he had an abusive father.  In the final battle at the mall, Billy finds Eleven and restrains her so the monster can get her.   Unbeknownst to him, Eleven has mysteriously lost her powers, and is not the threat she once was.  Anyway, Eleven reveals to Billy what she knows about him and, and this inspires him to sacrifice himself against the monster.  Meanwhile, the adults are in an underground Russian bunker trying to close the inter-dimensional gate.  When they succeed, the monster ceases to exist in our world.

OK - to analysis!  Will and Eleven, like Frodo, are both reluctant heroes.  They are given special powers only due to their contact with evil forces (The monster, the government, and the Ring).  They rise to the challenge, but none wish it had come.

El also has something in common with the Elves.  At the end of the third season she has lost her powers.  A new era has come.  And just like the Elves must fade (or accept mortality), so must El accept normalcy (Though of course I fully expect her to regain her powers in the next season).

Billy is like Boromir.  He’s corrupted by the evil power, but clearly despises evil.  But he was always a jerk, even without the evil.  But just as meeting Denethor gives us some insight into why Boromir was so proud, so does meeting Billy’s dad give us understanding into how he became a bully.  But Boromir, for his flaws, was honorable.  In the end, Billy also stood up to the evil that was trying to control him.  Boromir and Billy were both jerks whose fear of weakness made them susceptible to corruption.  But it’s hard to make the argument either of them were outright evil.

Another similarity I saw was the nature of the climax.  The battle at Starcourt Mall was exciting and noisy and heroic.  But that battle was just a delaying tactic.  What mattered was deep underground, at the Gate.  Similarly, the battle at the Black Gate is big and showy, but the only struggle that matters is Sam and Frodo’s.  Both stories show us that what’s on the surface can be superficial.  It’s the smaller struggles deep underground/in enemy territory that matter.

OK, but so what?  One can draw a lot of similarities between a lot of art.  The Hero’s Journey is an archetype that covers thousands of stories.  But the story of Odysseus, Moses, Luke Skywalker, and Ariel are all radically different, too.  What does it matter?

Art informs how we view the world.  What we see should reflect real life - otherwise what's the point?  We connect to art when we see ourselves.  And how we see ourselves can be both superficial and deep. We all know someone - and we may be someone - who was shaped by a poor relationship with an authority figure.  But whether Billy, Boromir, or Luke or Ariel resonates most with you is important, too.  Billy responded by trying to be above it all and "cool".  Boromir responded by doing everything he could to win his father's respect.  Luke is regularly betrayed by the authority in his life.  Obi-Wan and Uncle Owen lie to him about his father.  Darth Vader tries to get him to join the Dark Side.  And when Luke himself is the authority he ends up betraying Ben Solo - he cannot break the cycle.  Ariel has a yet different conflict with authority: What she wants is forbidden by her father, but she pursues it regardless.  The archetype is similar but the details remain important.

Learning the lessons of Lord of the Rings is a laudable goal unto itself (At least I hope it is!).  But once we familiarize ourselves with the underlying archetypes, we can use the similarities we see between it and other works to quickly see beneath their surface, too.  Art informs art.


The Lord of the Rings: An Ethical Guide is a Patreon-supported project.  Thank you to all those who have contributed.

Like this project?  Want to learn more?  Want exclusive access to behind-the-scenes content?  Go to my Patreon site and see how you can become a part of the action!

Sunday, July 21, 2019

Situations VS Events

What has been will be again,
what has been done will be done again;
there is nothing new under the sun.
Is there anything of which one can say,
“Look! This is something new!”?
It was here already, long ago;
it was here before our time.
(Ecclesiastes, 1:9-10)

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This week we read "The Black Gate Opens." Aragorn leads an army from Minas Tirith to the gate of Mordor to challenge Sauron to battle, his aim not to win through arms but through cunning.  He wants to draw Sauron's gaze out of Mordor so Frodo might have a better chance..

On the way the army skirmishes with a few enemies who are watching the road to the gate.  One such encounter occurs precisely where Faramir had ambushed the enemy on the day he first met Frodo and Sam.


A strong force of Orcs and Easterlings attempted to take their
leading companies in an ambush; and that was in the very place where
Faramir had waylaid the men of Harad, and the road went in a
deep cutting through an out-thrust of the eastward hills.

The terrain, of course, doesn't take a side.  Mountains and valleys don't care about war.  They exist to be used in every which way.  Cover can conceal both good and bad guys.

I want to talk today about the difference between situations and events.  Events are occurrences - they happen.  Events can be described in great detail:  Who did what, what they were wearing, how hard the wind was blowing, etc.  Events are specific moments in time and space.  Moving the moon landing from 1969 to 1959 fundamentally changes history.  Moving Hurricane Katrina to the Florida Keys drastically changes the recent history of New Orleans.  Events occur and can be described with great specificity..

Situations are events shorn of their details.  The perfect storm was a real storm that occurred in 1991, and was the unlikely but powerful combination of three weather systems.  Since that event, "a perfect storm" has become a moniker for any situation that can be described as the unlikely but powerful confluence of three factors.  You have perhaps experienced a perfect storm situation.  You will probably face more in the future.  That's the nature of situations: They can be applied over and over again.

When we evaluate the events in our lives, it can be useful to look at them as situations.  The details are too specific to learn much from.  Instead, we should look at the broad factors.  It's unlikely "we went to Hawaii and did fun things" will be useful in planning future vacations.  It may even lead to disappointment, if you return to Hawaii to do the exact same things you did before.  They were new and exciting the first time.  In planning future vacations it may be better to say of your Hawaiian adventure "we went somewhere new we were excited about, and researched fun things to do ahead of time".  That gives you useful actionable advice.  You liked doing something new that you could anticipate, and you looked up things to do ahead of time so you wouldn't have to spend a lot of time while on your vacation figuring out what to do.  You were able to just do it.

The more technical term for this is "schema", which is the plural of schemes.  Here, scheme isn't a shady plan, but a broad outline.  In education, schema are how we are able to learn math.  Learning 1+1=2 is of extremely limited value.  It is nothing more than a very specific math event.  We don't teach children each math problem - that would take forever.  We teach them the principles and processes of math, the "situation" of math.  Then they are able to solve all sorts of math problems, because they are applying the situation to the event.  Schema become the template upon which all education is based.

It is important for schema to be flexible.  Rarely do we know everything.  If we want our template to be useful, we need to be willing to update it.  Since schema can cover every possible reality, they need to bend quite a bit.  Reality does not bend.

Consider this:  Someone has a schema that relationships end when someone is unhappy.  Let's say this someone gets suddenly dumped.  They are, we understand, taken aback and surprised.  They may need some time to process it.  There are two main conclusions they can come to.

1.  My partner must have been unhappy and I just didn't know it.
2.  Relationships end when someone is unhappy or for no reason.

#1 is a reasonable reaction, and very likely to be true.
#2 is less reasonable and definitely not true.

Also, #1 describes an event.  It applies the schema to the event.  The schema says relationships end when someone is unhappy, my relationship just ended, I wasn't unhappy, my partner must have been.
#2, meanwhile, applies the event to the schema.  No reason is obvious, therefore it is obvious there was no reason.  A person who concludes #1 may, in the future, take time to check with their partner to make sure they are happy, knowing that some people will be unhappy without showing it.  A person who concludes #2 may become a much less reliable partner, since they now believe can relationships end randomly.

The schema is useful in understanding the event.  The event is unhelpful in understanding the schema.

But that doesn't mean events are worthless to us.  Events give context to the present.  An increased risk for heart attack is probably directly tied to actions you've taken, and not a broad understanding of the situations of your life.  Returning to the math comparison, one can complete a long division problem by doing specific division, multiplication, and subtracting problems.  A broad understanding of those things isn't enough, you need to do it.

Events are great in the moment.  We need to keep track of the, so we know what is happening around us.  The world moves fast, and it's helpful to see which dominoes are actually falling so we can react accordingly.

Situations, meanwhile, are great for understanding potential.  When "the Orcs and Easterlings" set up their ambush it is unlikely they chose that spot because of Faramir's ambush.  They just came upon it and realized how good it was for such an attack.  If you have good schema you can see potential events without needing to actually see them in happen.

Understanding situations is useful for planning for the future.  As my good friend Koheleth said in the introduction, "nothing is new under the sun."  Most events can be broken down into familiar situations, giving us better insight into them than we'd otherwise have.


The Lord of the Rings: An Ethical Guide is a Patreon-supported project.  Thank you to all those who have contributed.

Like this project?  Want to learn more?  Want exclusive access to behind-the-scenes content?  Go to my Patreon site and see how you can become a part of the action!

Monday, July 15, 2019

Humanity's Moral Compass

Though the battle to defend Minas Tirith has been won, the battle for Middle Earth is not over.  Frodo is in Mordor, alone except for Sam.  Victory and defeat are both in view and there is little those in Minas Tirith can do to change the outcome.

This chapter is called "The Last Debate," which refers to the discussions the leaders of Minas Tirith have.  They determine the best way to help Frodo is to distract Sauron.  They will send troops to the Black Gate and challenge Sauron directly.  Sauron, they figure, will send all the troops he has from Mordor to confront them, thus giving Frodo and Sam a better chance at success.  And if they die, at least they die fighting.

Elsewhere in Minas Tirith, Legolas and Gimli have a discussion about humans.  It begins with Gimli admiring the stone of Minas Tirith.

‘And doubtless the good stone-work is the older and was wrought in the
first building,’ said Gimli. ‘It is ever so with the things that Men begin: there is a
frost in Spring, or a blight in Summer, and they fail of their promise.’
‘Yet seldom do they fail of their seed,’ said Legolas. ‘And that will
lie in the dust and rot to spring up again in times and places
unlooked-for. The deeds of Men will outlast us, Gimli.’

To provide a bit more context, Gimli is remarking that while Minas Tirith was given a strong foundation, eventually humans failed.  First, with Isildur (the King) taking The One Ring, and then with Denethor (the Steward) committing suicide.  Both were acts of arrogance.  Humans showed great promise when they arrived in Middle Earth, but they have so far not met their potential.  Something goes wrong whether "a frost in Spring, or a blight in Summer."

But Legolas provides a different view.  Yes, humans may fail in an annual fashion, but those failures provide a fresh foundation for the future.  Humans may botch important historical moments, and individuals may not reach their potential, but slowly but surely humans learn from their mistakes, and their failings inform the future.  Aragorn's greatest attributes is his caution and humility.  One does not acquire these characteristics by success.

This is a nuanced view on progress.  Consider our own world.  At the end of every century, for the most part, the world is better than it was at the beginning.  Within each century, we can find moments of terrible and needless suffering, but that suffering (while still needless) can inspire a search for a better world for the future.

Failure is temporary.  Failure teaches empathy, compassion, and reflection.  Self-examination requires failure - what else would motivate it?  And if we agree with Socrates that "the unexamined life is not worth living" then what we're saying is that failure makes life worthy.

It's extremely disappointing to see potential go to waste.  Loyalty pledged to an unworthy cause.  Passion shown for immoral acts.  Joy found in cruelty.  Loyalty and passion and joy are all good, but they become problematic in certain cases.  If you see enough of this, you may turn to cyncism - the only ones motivated to do anything are the bad guys.  Evil will always triumph because good is dumb.

But there's some small comfort knowing that, as a whole, humanity progresses for the better.  There may be failures, and there may be tragedies, and there may be needless suffering, but we need not despair of the whole.  Like the invisible hand of the free market, there's an invisible hand of humanity's moral compass.  It may not always work on the individual level, but on the whole, we get results.  The understanding of human rights in 2000 is considerably better than the understanding of human rights in 1900.

I purposely said this is a "small comfort."  The wheel of progress doesn't release us from our responsibilities to participate.  In fact, it's pointedly unethical to say "This all works out in the end - I can do what I want."  An ethical guide should challenge and inspire, not excuse.  That's a recipe for despair.

And, as I've noted before, despair is a real killer.  Despair has short term and long term consequences which are almost too obvious to be worth mentioning.  So instead, let's talk about recycling.

The most effective way to get people to recycle, it turns out, is to get other people to recycle.  Peer pressure works.  In fact, the pressure doesn't even have to be real.  The best way to encourage recycling, it turns out, is to tell people other people are recycling.  We all have a primal desire to be part of the group.  If we think "the group" is recycling, we will recycle.


We should do good, and in doing good we will motivate others to do good.  And the more do-gooders there are, the more people may be motivated to do good.  And on and on and on.  We should support others who do good, and we should help ensure loyalty, passion and joy support good and not evil.  Indeed, that is precisely what the invisible hand of the moral compass is: The result of innumerable individuals doing what is right.  Without that, nothing pushes the needle northward.

If most people don't see any point in doing what's right, and most people don't see anyone else doing what's right, that's a pretty strong foundation for wrong-doing to occur.  Not because most people have become evil, but because they don't DO good.  Being not-evil isn't enough.  Even being good isn't enough.  What's needed is action.  Public action on behalf of good.  Anything less only empowers evil, and weakens the magnet pulling humanity's needle north.  We may 'fail of our promise' but we must try.  To hijack a common saying: It is better to resist and lose than to yield willingly to evil.  Our failures can inspire the future.  Our surrender will not.

As long as we know what's right, we have a chance to withstand evil.  But once we allow our sense of what's right to become muddled, everything is lost.


The Lord of the Rings: An Ethical Guide is a Patreon-supported project.  Thank you to all those who have contributed.

Like this project?  Want to learn more?  Want exclusive access to behind-the-scenes content?  Go to my Patreon site and see how you can become a part of the action!

Sunday, July 7, 2019

What is the PRIMARY goal?

This week we read "The Pyre of Denethor" and "The Houses of Healing."  When the Rohirrim arrive to break the siege of Gondor, we would expect the leaders of Minas Tirith to be overjoyed with relief.  Instead, Pippin and Gandalf must confront Denethor, who has given up hope and decided the best action is to die sooner than wait for the forces of Mordor to do kill him.  His intention is to burn himself and Faramir alive.  In the second chapter, the battle has ended and the surviving characters recover from their wounds.

We will stick with the first chapter, "The Pyre of Denethor."  Denethor has been a difficult character to understand for most of our text.  He needs Gandalf's help, but resents him every step of the way.  He takes Pippin into his personal service, but doesn't give him much to do.  This chapter untangles the mystery:  Denethor has had his own Palantír, and has used it to communicate with Sauron.  But unlike Saruman, who betrays the West, Denethor's communication leads to despair.

When Gandalf comes with hope, Denethor does not believe him.  When Gandalf does not tell him of Aragorn's coming, Sauron reveals that fact, causing Denethor to consider Gandalf a usurper.  And so Denethor is led astray both by Sauron and also his own desire of self-reliance.  He is so self-centered that, when he finally lights his own pyre, he takes the Palantír into the flames with him.

Denethor's arrogance leads to some serious strife.  He orders his men to bring torches so he can set himself and Faramir ablaze.  Beregond, Pippin's friend in the guard, refuses the command and draws his sword against the others.  When Gandalf arrives, Beregond has killed three men.  After Gandalf sets the record straight, he says:  ‘Work of the Enemy!  Such deeds he loves: friend at war with friend; loyalty divided in confusion of hearts.’  If the men of Minas Tirith kill each other, Sauron's goal is that much easier.

The 2020 Democratic primary is underway.  There are a variety of candidates out there, all with pros and cons.

(A note before we continue.  I'm writing from a Democratic voter point of view, since I am a Democratic voter.  Maybe you consider yourself an independent, or even a Republican.  However, if you intend to vote for Trump (who has put people in concentration camps in our country) you need this ethical guide more than most.  Don't bother with this post.  Instead, read this and this and get back to me with questions.)

The beauty of a primary is it's a way for the party to engage in a public debate about their ideas.  Bold, or incremental?  Familiar, or new?  What issues should be prioritized?  All of these are healthy things to discuss.  But the problem with a primary is, if the disagreements are too deep, you may end up with a candidate everyone dislikes equally.

Generally, arguments between friends and partners is good.  Arguments are a showcase of values.  They are an opportunity to hear the values of others and to figure out where the common ground is (not to be confused with 'middle ground').  To take a time honored example, teenagers may want to stay out late with their friends.  Their parents may feel nervous about them staying out late into the night.  A bad solution becomes a power struggle: The teen says they want independence, but the adult says their anxiety about their safety takes precedence.  This teaches that independence is in conflict with safety, and also teaches the teen to be subservient (or motivates rebellion).  A good solution avoids this zero-sum lens.  The teen can stay out late, but they will text their parents every 45 minutes who they are with.  Both sides get what they want, even if it isn't exactly what they envisioned.

There are 22+ candidates to choose from.  Some are worse than others.  Hopefully the field will shrink before Iowa.  And then we'll vote, have more debates, vote more, and finally have one candidate that clearly has the most support.  In that case, all our fighting up to then will have been good.

Look at the text again: Gandalf does not complain of "Friend battling friend."  He battles with people all the time - with Denethor, with Gimli, with Pippin.  The issue is being "at war with friend".  War is different - war is large and wholesale.  Battles are smaller things, which one can win or lose without destruction.  But war is different.

While we argue over the candidates and their policies and their pasts, we must keep in mind our common objective: Defeating Donald Trump.  That's the war we need to focus on.  From Biden to Williamson, all the candidates oppose his atrocious policies on immigration, which is causing real suffering right now, directly and indirectly.  Similarly, they all have a vision of increasing healthcare access, decreasing the wealth gap, and confronting global climate change.  Each of their visions, of course, are different.  But at least they have such goals, whereas Trump does not (he claims to want to fight the wealth gap, but has only worsened it).

And yet there is despair.  I understand it.  I've heard - from family gatherings to the workplace - different people say "Trump's going to win, it is no use."  It's very early to be feeling thus.  I hope the primary invigorates these people, and that they find a candidate that they can get excited about.

Excited, but not attached.  Part of Denethor's despair is attached to his arrogance.  Gandalf asks him what he wants and he says:


‘I would have things as they were in all the days of my life,’ answered Denethor,
‘and in the days of my longfathers before me: to be the Lord of this City in peace,
and leave my chair to a son after me, who would be his own master and no wizard’s
pupil. But if doom denies this to me, then I will have naught: neither life
diminished, nor love halved, nor honour abated.’

Being excited about a candidate is a great thing.  It means we may donate to them, buy their bumper stickers and lawn signs, make phone calls, canvas door to door, or go to a rally.  All of these things will help.  However, at a certain point only ONE candidate will win the primary.  It is likely it will not be our first candidate of choice.  And now we differentiate between excited and attached.

If we are excited for your candidate, and they are not the nominee, that will be disappointing.  But the candidate will be officially announced in the summer of 2020 - the election is of course in November.  That's plenty of time to process our disappointment and get behind the actual candidate - maybe with less gusto than otherwise.  But behind them nonetheless.

But if we are attached to our candidate, we may see their loss of the nomination as a personal loss.  Not only was our candidate rejected by the party, but WE will feel rejected by the party.  We may want to reject them in turn and refuse to vote.  We lose the battle and give up the whole war.  "Work of the enemy" indeed.

We would be fools to be arrogant like Denethor.  A candidate we think is half as good as our first pick is still much better than Trump.  I wrote explicitly about our political situation once before.  In that post, I said: 

Often we hear: "What is required for evil to triumph is
for good people to do nothing."  Often we think that do-nothing attitude is
intentional - the good people don't care.  What if it's a byproduct of caring too much?
If we allow despair and paralysis to take hold within us, surely our enemies will triumph.

Bitterness and pride are ruinous.  There are people dying in concentration camps in our country.  Vote Democrat in 2020.  Have a preference of candidates and fight for your priorities, but in the end, on November 3rd, 2020, vote Democrat.  It is unconscionable to let people suffer in squalor because you didn't get 100% of what you wanted.

NB: While I linked a lot of articles casting dispersions of many canidates, I meant for those articles to be an example of negative opinions.  They are not reflective of my opinions (With the exception of trashing Marianne Williamson.  If you plan to vote for her, let's talk).

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